


boyfriend (can you imagine?)

by aobajohsais_manager



Series: love like a melody [2]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe - College/University, Fluff and Angst, Getting Together, Living Together, M/M, Med Student Iwaizumi Hajime, Mutual Pining, Oneshot, Pining, Slice of Life, Sort Of, University Student Oikawa Tooru, university volleyball team
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-20
Updated: 2021-01-20
Packaged: 2021-03-17 19:08:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,779
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28854072
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aobajohsais_manager/pseuds/aobajohsais_manager
Summary: "What was that?" Iwaizumi was breathless and Tooru took pride in surprising him."A kiss, Iwa-chan! I know you're not very popular but surely you know what a kiss is." Tooru grinned up at him."I hate you." Iwaizumi growled. "Why did you kiss me, stupid?""Because I wanted to." Tooru huffed. "God, you're so heavy Iwa-chan. Get off me."//Tooru finds himself in a 'best friends that kiss' situation and realizes he wants Iwaizumi all to himself. even though Iwaizumi had made it clear that he doesn't want to be Tooru's boyfriend.
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru
Series: love like a melody [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2024375
Kudos: 52





	boyfriend (can you imagine?)

**Author's Note:**

> Hello!!
> 
> It's been so long since I added a Oneshot to this series lmao. This one is inspired by Ariana Grande's [Boyfriend](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nA862JDEoKs) with a mix of her [Imagine](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oRcXOnLkM7A)
> 
> I feel like every song could be an Iwaoi song, but don't worry there'll be more ships soon!

Graduation had been a sombre event for all the third years. Tooru wasn’t special, but it felt like it hit him more than it did for everyone else. Of course, he was excited to get on with life; to move out, to play advanced volleyball, to find happiness. But leaving this school, where he’d made so many memories with Mattsun and Makki, and his volleyball club. He was anxious about the future but also thrilled to become more.

Though the steady part in all that would be Iwaizumi. They moved in together and comforted each other when home felt like it was a galaxy away. They explored Tokyo together and they filled in their apartment with things one at a time. 

Tooru was sitting on the couch, watching a match on TV while feeling very happy at how his life was going. For sure, he expected things to gradually become more but right now, he was content with everything as it is. Even the little scuffles he has with Iwaizumi.

"What the hell, Oikawa?" Iwaizumi's voice rung through the hallway of their apartment. "Come back here, idiot!"   
  
Tooru, light on his feet, leaps from the couch, narrowly missing Iwaizumi's hands from grabbing him. He sprang from room to room neatly avoiding Iwaizumi's grasp...until he couldn't.  
  
"No Iwa-chan!" Tooru squawked as Hajime promptly tackled him. "This is domestic violence."  
  
"Yeah, well it’s about to be a murder case in a moment." Iwaizumi growled, finally managing to push Tooru onto the floor and sit on top of him. "Where. did. you. hide it." He accentuated each period with a punch into Tooru's gut.   
  
"You have to find it. Iwa-chan." Tooru laughed despite the scowling Iwaizumi on top of him. "Why don't you ever have fun."  
  
"Fun? Oh, I'll definitely be having fun..." Iwaizumi's glower turned to a smirk as his face inched closer to Tooru's. "...when I tell your mom what you did last summer when you told her you were at my house."  
  
Tooru gasped. "You wouldn't." But Tooru looked into the mischief playing in Iwaizumi's eyes and wasn't so sure. "You totally would."   
  
"Fine," Tooru said, feigning weakness for a second. When he felt Iwaizumi's grip loosen, Tooru made his move by pushing Iwaizumi backwards. To no avail.   
Iwaizumi tackled Tooru back on to the floor this time pressing himself closer to Tooru's body.  
  
Iwaizumi pinned Tooru's arms above his head. "I won't ask you again, Oikawa."   
  
There was a silence. It suddenly occurred to Tooru that if anyone walked in on them at this moment, they would come across the two of them in a very sexual position. Iwaizumi seemed to realize this too as his ears turned a bright red and his scowl twitched in place.   
  
Oh, Tooru could work with this.   
  
Slowly, holding Iwaizumi's gaze, Tooru pressed his lips against Iwaizumi's. Iwaizumi in turn made a strangled noise in the back of his throat.  
  
Just as slowly as Tooru initiated the kiss, he broke it.  
  
"What was that?" Iwaizumi was breathless and Tooru took pride in surprising him.  
  
"A kiss, Iwa-chan! I know you're not very popular but surely you know what a kiss is." Tooru grinned up at him.   
  
"I hate you." Iwaizumi growled. "Why did you kiss me, stupid?"   
  
"Because I wanted to." Tooru huffed. "God, you're so heavy Iwa-chan. Get off me."  
  
Iwaizumi ignored his pleas and instead pressed his mouth against Tooru's. Tooru opened it in surprise and immediately, Iwaizumi licked into his mouth, sucking on Tooru's bottom lip. It was embarrassing when a sound like a moan came out of Tooru.   
  
Iwaizumi released his grip on Tooru's arms, allowing Tooru to drag them down Iwaizumi's back. They took a breath before Tooru delved his tongue into Iwaizumi's. He took the opportunity to flip their positions, so it was Tooru on top of Iwaizumi. Their tongues fought for dominance in Iwaizumi's mouth before Tooru bit Iwaizumi's lip gently drawing a groan out of him.   
  
Tooru kissed over Iwaizumi's chin, his jaw, his neck and softly sucked on the pulse point near his collar.   
  
"Oikawa. Oikawa." Iwaizumi huffed as his hand slipped into Tooru's hair and pulled it to make him stop.  
  
"What, Iwa-chan?" Tooru said, watching the reddening neck while pondering whether he could get away with sucking a hickey on him.   
  
"We got to talk about this."   
  
Tooru sighed. Iwaizumi did have a point. He sat up from Iwaizumi, putting a good foot between them. Iwaizumi pulled himself up and rested his back against the wall closest to them.   
  
"What are we doing?" Iwaizumi started off the awkward conversation.   
  
"I told you, Iwa-chan. It’s called kissing."   
  
"Be serious. Oikawa." Iwaizumi looked uncomfortable for a moment before saying, "I don't want to be your boyfriend, okay?"  
  
Tooru had to stop his breath from catching. It was like a blow to Tooru's pride. Was being his boyfriend really a bad thing?   
  
Still, Tooru, shrugged offhandedly. "I wasn't looking for a relationship with you, anyways."   
  
"Okay, good." Iwaizumi said. "That's it I think."  
  
"Okay." Tooru immediately began to climb into Iwaizumis lap.   
  
"Wait." Iwaizumi stuttered, cheeks turning slightly red. "No sex either."  
  
Tooru pouted. "I'm not going to do anything you don't like Iwa-chan, have a bit more faith in me." He started positioning himself onto Iwaizumi's lap so that his thighs were pressed to Iwaizumi's sides.  
  
"I just wanted to clear that up," Iwaizumi murmured watching him carefully. "So that we're on the same page."  
  
"When have we not been on the same page, Iwa-chan." Tooru replied before kissing him roughly again.   
  
Iwaizumi opened his mouth to him, reaching up to cradle Tooru's jaw. Tooru hummed in approval, curling his own hand behind Iwaizumi's head.   
  
"It's in the laundry room by the way." Tooru said before diving back in and sucking on Iwaizumi's lip.  
  
Iwaizumi pulled back and Tooru's breath hitched at the sight of his hair ruffled, lips swollen and--  
  
"I hate you. Die." Iwaizumi said pushing Tooru of his lap, leaving Tooru cackling on the floor. 

  
  
\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

  
  
Tooru knocked on Iwaizumi's bedroom door. The chill of night in winter made it too cold for Tooru to fall asleep and the stress from upcoming university assessments and volleyball practice was getting to him. Tooru creaked the door open to find Iwaizumi reading a book. Tooru crept up to his bed and slowly crawled under the sheets.   
  
"You good?" Iwaizumi said glancing up from his book.  
  
"Can't sleep." Tooru mumbles tucking his head under Iwaizumi's arm, nudging at it impatiently.  
  
"You'll lose all your pretty hair if you worry too much." Iwaizumi says indulging him by running a hand through the said amber hair.   
  
"Did you just call me pretty?" Tooru says, manoeuvring his hand to quickly snatch the book out of Iwaizumi's hand to place it on the nightstand. Iwaizumi grunts in protest but Tooru pulls him down into a lazy kiss. Tooru hums in appreciation as Iwaizumi then plunges his tongue into Tooru's turning the kiss into something deeper. They draw closer, body's pressed together as Tooru's hands feel Iwaizumi's arms, his back, then lacing through his short, thick hair.  
  
Suddenly Iwaizumi is pushing him into the mattress and licks at his lips sucking gently on his bottom lip, nipping it slightly, leaving Tooru breathless. Iwaizumi pulls back looking pleased at his reaction. "When did you get so good at kissing?" Tooru puffs out.   
  
Iwaizumi sweeps his lips down his jaw and bites down at the junction between his neck and shoulder, causing Tooru to moan. "I'm not a virgin you know." Iwaizumi says briefly before licking at the mark soothingly.   
  
The words make Tooru freeze slightly. Sure, he'd always known Iwaizumi got some action, after all, he was a really good-looking guy. But Tooru didn't think Iwaizumi was the type to take a relationship the whole 9 yards.   
  
Iwaizumi snorts, almost like he could read Tooru's thoughts. "Don't look surprised, idiot. You really think I'd stay a virgin after 21 years?"  
  
Tooru wonders who took Iwaizumi's virginity. Who was Iwaizumi so fond of that he let them take a part of himself? Was it one of the girlfriends that had never lasted for more than 2 weeks, or maybe a one-night stand? The thought of a faceless stranger in Tooru's place, kissing and touching Iwaizumi left a sour taste in his mouth.   
  
Iwaizumi continued to kiss up his neck before joining their mouths together languidly. Tooru wanted to drown in the pleasure but the faceless stranger haunted his head, taunting him.   
  
"Iwa-chan." Tooru murmured against Iwaizumi's lips. "Iwa-chan, I'm sleepy."   
  
Iwaizumi hums, placing a brief, lingering kiss before lowering himself next to Tooru and turning out the reading lamp. "Night, Oikawa." Iwaizumi mumbles, arms wrapping around Tooru's waist, pulling him flush against his chest.  
  
It was muscle memory at this point, after so many years of sleeping in the same bed because they couldn't be bothered to pull out the guest futon.   
  
It was muscle memory to lose himself in the warmth of Iwaizumi's chest, breathing in his scent, curling his face into Iwaizumi's neck.   
  
It was the only place where sleep was guaranteed because nothing felt safer than being wrapped in Iwaizumi, in the feeling of home.

He wondered what it would be like to curl up like this after a night of steamy sex. He wondered if Iwaizumi would kiss him sweetly, and murmur loving words into his skin as Tooru pushed his face into the crook of Iwaizumi's neck. Oh, what a wonderful world that would be.   
  
But tonight, a faceless stranger laughed at Tooru's naivety, at Tooru's jealousy.

Tooru finds trouble sleeping at all.

  
\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

  
  
Tooru could almost feel the impact of the ball reverberate throughout the entire gym from the forceful serve he just made.   
  
Tooru should feel proud but all he could think, was more, be more, it’s not enough, it’s never enough.  
Tooru wiped the sweat of his brow with the hem of his shirt. Maybe he should do more arm workouts after this to make sure the ball was flying at its maximum speed. Tooru jumped again slamming the ball down, landing just past the outline of the court.   
  
Dammit, Tooru growls to himself.   
  
"You should stop trying so hard." a voice said behind him, an irritatingly smug voice belonging to Kuroo Tetsurou. "It’s throwing you off."  
  
"If I were you, I'd be practicing this hard just to make it to the starting line-up." Tooru sneered back, words aimed to hurt. Kuroo just stood there smirking.   
  
"I would, but apparently I'm now Iwaizumi Hajime's eyes and ears around you and that's taking up all my time." Kuroo retorted. He picked up the stray balls and threw them back into the basket. "And your Iwa-chan says it’s time to go home."  
  
Tooru's heart raced at the words your Iwa-chan, though he tried not to let Kuroo see it. "I thought you had more self-respect but seems like I was wrong since you're doing everybody's dirty works."   
  
"Only Iwaizumi's dirty works." Kuroo said, winking suggestively. Tooru stood shell-shocked for a moment. Was it this guy that Iwaizumi was sleeping with? Tooru looked Kuroo up and down. He could see the appeal, but he didn't think this was Iwaizumi's type.   
  
Then again, Iwaizumi made out with his own best friend every night so maybe Tooru didn't really know much about what Iwaizumi liked.   
  
"Woah, chill! No need to make that face." Tooru had forgotten to mask his distaste. Kuroo grinned like he had won. "I'm not trying to take your man or anything."  
  
"Oh, you're free to do so. He's not mine." Tooru said albeit bitterly. Tooru was selfish, yes, but if Iwaizumi found happiness with a guy like Kuroo then Tooru would be nothing but supportive.  
  
"So, it's a friend with benefits thing?" Kuroo said, but Tooru ignored him and resumed packing up the equipment.   
  
"Have you two gone all the way?" Kuroo asked as Tooru locked up.  
  
"I don't see how any of that is your business." Tooru growled, eyes flashing dangerously.  
  
However, Kuroo didn't back down. He looked solemn all of a sudden. "Look, I know you probably don't want to hear this but from as your friend--"  
  
"Who said we were friends?" Tooru sneered to cover up the nervousness he felt about Kuroo's next words.   
  
Kuroo went on like he wasn't interrupted. "--I want to warn you about going too far. Crossing that line would change everything between you two even if you think it won't." Kuroo placed his hand on Tooru's shoulder to make sure he listened. "I know what it’s like to lose a best friend because of one night of lust. It was years ago and we're only just starting to get back to normal."  
  
"That's not going to happen to me and Iwa-chan." Tooru affirmed.  
  
Kuroo looked at him sympathetically and all Tooru wanted to do was punch that look of pity of his face. "Just don't do anything you know you'll regret in the future."  
  
"Yeah, thanks." Tooru said walking away although the words churned inside his head.   
  
"Goodnight Oikawa." Kuroo said turning the other way.   
  
Tooru was frustrated and slightly tipsy from the can of beer he bought before he got home. Iwaizumi looked concerned immediately as he walked through the door and the look sent a thrill up Tooru's spine. The joy died down when he realized that one day Iwaizumi wouldn't look at him like that. Then, Tooru would have no one to keep him accountable, to make him feel safe.   
  
The thought was shoved into the back of his mind as Tooru grabbed for Iwaizumi and kissed him deeply on the mouth. Iwaizumi kissed back, after a moment of hesitation, but pulled away quickly.   
  
"Oikawa, what's wrong." Iwaizumi said, only slightly fighting Tooru when he pulled them both down on to the couch. Tooru ignored him and kissed him again this time down the length of Iwaizumi's bronze neck. He sucked hard at his collar, thinking I must make him mine, as he did so. Iwaizumi moaned and Tooru relished in the sound.   
  
"O-Oikawa. Wait." Iwaizumi said breathing heavily. "Stop for a minute."  
  
When Tooru didn't stop, Iwaizumi pulled his face to meet his eyes. "What's wrong."  
  
"Nothing." Tooru said leaning in to capture his lips again. Tooru positioned them on the couch so he was now straddling Iwaizumi. Tooru's hands swept under his shirt feeling the hard muscle, the strong foundations. Quickly he pulled off the shirt only separating from Iwaizumi's lips for a second before diving in just as furiously.  
  
"Oikawa, H-Hold--" Iwaizumi broke off into a moan and pride flooded into Tooru for being able to make him moan like that. Then Tooru realized he probably wasn't the only one who has heard Iwaizumi make such noises. The thought was a bell ringing in his head.  
  
Make him yours, Tooru growled into Iwaizumi skin. He should be mine. Iwaizumi breathed harshly trying to keep up with Tooru, but he kept pushing on, needing more, more, more.  
  
Kuroo's words whispered faintly in the background but it was lost in the loud ringing of He won't be yours, He never will be.  
  
Tooru's hands unclasped the belt on Iwaizumi's pants.   
  
"Oikawa. Oikawa, stop." Iwaizumi's hands were pulling them away. They were shifting and Tooru felt so far away from him, like he was being left out, left behind.   
  
"Please, please." Tooru begged. His chest felt tight, like it was going to burst. "just once."  
  
"No, Oikawa. That was the deal." Iwaizumi's eyes were hard. A spark of true anger shone in the green-hazel eyes, and immediately Tooru felt guilty for pushing.   
  
"Sorry." Tooru said clambering off Iwaizumi. His voice was choked and Tooru hated himself for trying to hold back the wetness in his eyes. "I-I didn't mean to." But you did. A voice whispers. Tooru gulps down the sick feeling pulsating in his stomach.   
  
Iwaizumi's eyes soften a bit. "It's fine." He must sense that Tooru is about to break down, because in a gentler voice he says, "It's alright Oikawa."   
  
Tooru nods slowly but doesn't meet his eyes. Quietly Iwaizumi turns on the TV to find a Japanese drama playing. They sit on the couch, at a distant larger than normal.   
  
Tooru can't find it in himself to rest his head on Iwaizumi's lap like he usually would.   
  
Iwaizumi silently keeps to himself as well.   
  
They both pretend like nothing has changed even though Tooru can feel the chasm between the slowly growing. 

  
  
\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  


  
"Hey Oikawa, I'm home!"   
  
"Welcome back, Iwa-chan." Tooru said as he walked out from his room to greet Iwaizumi. Immediately he was frozen in place by the girl standing behind him.   
  
"'Iwa-chan'? Oh my gosh, that's so cute." The girl said. She was pretty, with a sharply cut hair and a petite face. Tooru's stomach churned.   
  
"Shut up." Iwaizumi told the girl although his face was tinted pink. "Oikawa this is my partner for a project, Miyami Kisa. Mi-chan, this is my best friend, Oikawa."  
  
Mi-chan? Iwaizumi had a nickname for this girl already? Tooru plastered on his most charming smile. "Nice to meet you! Am I allowed to call you Mi-chan too?"   
  
The girl giggled. Iwaizumi ignored him and turned to the girl. "Go sit down, Mi-chan. I'll make you some tea before we get started."   
  
Tooru followed Iwaizumi into the kitchen, the grin falling of his face immediately. "You didn't tell me you were bringing anyone home, Iwa-chan."  
  
"It was a last-minute thing Oikawa." Iwaizumi says pulling out two teacups. "Please just don't do anything inappropriate."  
  
"When am I ever inappropriate?" Tooru guffawed. Iwaizumi gave him a look. "Fine. Geez. I won't do anything."  
  
Tooru sat at the kitchen table while Iwaizumi and Miyami made themselves comfortable at the coffee table. He couldn't hear what they were talking about exactly, but they were both laughing and whispering. It was definitely not biology.   
  
The sight of it made Tooru's insides twist. He pulled out his phone to distract himself, but he couldn't concentrate on anything but the sound of Iwaizumi laughing at one of her (most likely bad) jokes.   
  
The feeling inside Tooru was growing uncomfortable and so he went into his room to block them out. It took a while to mute the thoughts running through his head, but he managed to lose himself in a novel for a good amount of time before he decided it would be safe to go back out.   
  
He felt a pulse of anger when he saw that Miyami was still here. It’s been hours.   
  
"Iwa-chan." Tooru says, only slightly trying to hide his annoyance. Iwaizumi looked up at him when he heard the tone of Tooru's voice. "I'm going out."  
  
"At this hour?" Iwaizumi said focusing on the papers before him.  
  
"Nothing. We just need more condoms for tonight." Oikawa says smoothly, pulling his shoes on. He hears a pen clatter behind him, and smirks at the face he knows Iwaizumi must be making. Serves him right. "It was nice meeting you Miyami-san."   
  
"O-Oh," She looked embarrassed. Exactly as Tooru had hoped. "See you around, Oikawa-kun."  
  
Tooru merely nods and walks out without looking back.   
  
He wandered the streets to pass the time, doing nothing in particular. He did stop by the grocers to get essentials but didn't bother buying what he said he was going to. What's the point when Iwaizumi has made it clear that he wants nothing from Tooru except a make out session every now and then?  
  
He spent a good half an hour outside, before considering that Miyami should have left by now.  
  
He knew what to expect when he walked through the door. He stood outside for a whole minute, composing himself before turning the handle.   
  
"What the hell was that?" Iwaizumi growled, not looking up from the TV show that he wasn't really watching.   
  
"What was what?" Tooru said as he made himself comfortable on the couch like nothing was out of the ordinary.  
  
"You purposefully made Mi-chan feel uncomfortable before."  
  
"And if I did?" Tooru looked at him with a steady gaze.   
  
"Oikawa, that was a jerk thing to do."   
  
"What can I say? I am a jerk." Tooru said nonchalantly, turning back to the movie playing on screen. The feeling from before emerged so unexpectedly that it almost made Tooru gag with its sudden appearance.   
  
"Geez, Oikawa." Iwaizumi said, frustration leaking into his tone. "Was it because I brought her home?"  
  
"You can bring whoever you like home." Tooru glancing at Iwaizumi from the corner of his eye. "It’s not like I'm your boyfriend to be jealous of these things."  
  
"Oh, is this what it’s about?" Iwaizumi snapped. "Because I said I didn't want to date you? You even said it was just kissing."  
  
"It was just kissing." Tooru said under his breath.   
  
"And what is that supposed to mean?" Iwaizumi said, now focusing on Tooru, although Tooru didn't turn to face him.   
  
"I'm not doing this right now. And it's not like you'll care anyways so--."  
  
"What are you trying to say, Oikawa?" His eyes were hard, yet confused and hurt, making Tooru feel guilty. He didn't mean to say it like that, but if Tooru put his feelings into words it would change them both, more than just having sex would.   
  
"Nothing. It means what it means." Tooru said but his voice wavered, and still he refused to meet Iwaizumi's eyes. All the swagger from before faded into nothingness, leaving behind a cowardice.  
  
"No. It’s not nothing. Tell me, Tooru." Iwaizumi says shifting closer to him. "Tell me so we can fix whatever is happening."  
  
"You can't fix my feelings, Iwa-chan." Tooru said bitterly. "You can't fix these horrible, selfish feelings inside me."   
  
"What feelings, Oikawa?" He was closer now, just outside of Tooru's space. "Talk to me, please."   
  
Maybe it was the note of something in Iwaizumi's voice that made Tooru spill what was haunting him the most. "I feel like you're far away from me. Like you're moving ahead and I'm falling behind because I can't let go."  
  
"Let go?" Iwaizumi says and Tooru looks at him. The hard lines of his face show something too--sadness, anxiety, and Tooru almost gasped, hope.   
  
"Let go of you." Tooru breathed. There he did it.   
  
Iwaizumi's face shifted from a series of emotions before finally stopping at one Tooru would almost describe as pleading.   
  
"You have to spell it out for me, Oikawa. I don't want to misunderstand." Iwaizumi says and Tooru is overcome with a feeling of anger. How much more does Tooru have to explain these embarrassing feelings?  
  
"Is it not obvious?" Tooru bursts. "You know, Iwa-chan. You know what I mean."  
  
"I do." Iwaizumi says staring at him, expression suddenly unreadable. Tooru holds his gaze because really, it’s become unbearable--the weight of secrets.   
  
It feels better now that Iwaizumi knows. It also feels like his heart is being crushed in his chest.  
  
"Yeah." Tooru says, a bit dumbly after the intense conversation. He turns back to the TV the awkward silence hanging between them.  
  
"Wh-When did it happen?" Iwaizumi says drawing back Tooru's eyes.   
  
"Does anyone really know when they start liking someone?" Tooru scoffs. Iwaizumi blushes looking embarrassed. "I'm sure you've had crushes before." It was a harsh yet fleeting thought that hurt his heart.   
  
"Shut up. I meant like--when did you realize," Iwaizumi says. "that you liked me?"  
  
"I think, I've always known." Tooru says looking down at his hands. "It was more obvious though, when I was getting jealous over random people around you."  
  
"You don't have to be jealous, Oikawa. I'm always going to be here." Iwaizumi says.   
  
"I know. That's the problem. I might not be the one for you. But I'm so, so smitten. I want to say, 'Yes I can live without you' But I can't! I can't because every best part of me is you. It’s always going to be you."  
  
"Oikawa, don't do that." Iwaizumi said voice oddly thick. His eyes were blown wide in surprise. "Don't say it like you believe I'm going to leave you."  
  
" But you might. I'm a train wreck, I know. I've got so many issues. But it’s really hard to pretend I don't feel anything for you. I'm not your boyfriend and you're not mine but the thought of you with someone else, hurts so much Iwa-chan." Tooru inches closer. He wants to grasp at his hands, shake his shoulders, scream in his face I'm in love with you! is it not obvious?  
  
"You're so careful with words, sometimes it’s so hard to read you. I didn't know Tooru, I swear."  
  
"I don't care if you didn't know." Tooru huffs, choking back the lump in his throat. "I'm telling you now."   
  
"I don't want to be part of the list of people you've dated and broken up with after two weeks. I don't want to just be one of your flings." Iwaizumi shifts closer, just short of touching him.  
  
"No," Oikawa said his voice strangled. "You'd never be one of those. You're different. You know that. You're just scared like I am."  
  
They were both quiet, the silence broken only by their heavy breathing.   
  
"Say you don't want anything to do with me, Iwa-chan, and I'll stop it all. I'm not going to make this weird between us because you being my best friends is fine. I'll get over you. I can try." Tooru's eyes were wet now and the tears were threatening to fall out.   
  
"I don't want that." Iwaizumi said, looking at him with fierce green eyes. "I don't want you to get over me."  
  
Their faces are close now, so close, Tooru can see the gold flecks in his eyes. "It's not going to be like before. Say something now, Iwa-chan, before I drag you into something you don't want."   
  
They breathe each other in for a second, Tooru filled with anxiousness.   
  
Then Iwaizumi leans forward and presses his lips against Tooru's.  
  
It’s not like before, when it was grabbing hands and tongues fighting for dominance. This was Iwaizumi's soft lips moving gently against his own, like he wanted to taste Tooru, to savour him.   
Tooru leaned in, hands finding Iwaizumi's cheeks, and kisses back.   
  
It tastes like honey and lemon all at once before turning salty. Iwaizumi pulls back slightly and there's silent streams of tears running down Tooru's cheek.  
  
"This might be the worst decision of your life. A lot of things could go wrong." Tooru sighs.  
  
Iwaizumi leans his forehead against Tooru's. "It won't. We won't. We've been together for so long; this won’t change us." He presses a kiss against his cheek and pulls back a little further. "I swear, the way we fight made me honestly feel like--"  
  
"Like what?" Tooru asks.  
  
"Like we were always in love." Iwaizumi whispers, and Tooru's breath hitches because wow, this was really happening. His cheeks were still wet and Tooru's going to start sobbing any minute--  
  
"You said you're a train wreck, but I am too. I lose my mind when it comes to you. You don't know, Oikawa, how long I've felt like this. Loving you sometimes drives me crazy and then suddenly we started making out on the floor one day, and I swear my heart was going to burst."  
  
Tooru's sobbing now and Iwaizumi is pulling him to his chest, wrapping his arms around Tooru into a tight embrace.   
  
"I don't want to be your boyfriend. It doesn't feel like a good enough word for what I have with you. I just want to be us. I know we're so complicated, but you know I take time with the ones I choose."  
  
"How are we going to do this? You know I've never been good at relationships Iwa-chan. I'm going to make us fall apart." Tooru tucks his face into the crook of Iwaizumi's neck. He knows that he is an ugly crier, and his face is probably red and blotchy now.  
  
"A relationship is a two-person job, Oikawa. You trust me, right? I'll be there with you no matter what comes between us. We don't have to tell anyone. We can just be us." Iwaizumi says from above him. "Even if we're not 'boyfriends' I probably wouldn't see nobody else. You can trust me."  
  
"I trust you." Tooru says, breaking into a sob again and wraps his arm tighter around Iwaizumi's neck.   
  
"Stop crying, Baby-kawa." Iwaizumi chuckles and presses a kiss to the top of Tooru's head. "Smile Tooru."  
  
Tooru pulls back, just a little bit so that their faces are mere inches apart, and beams at him.


End file.
